Copyright 2000 --- Robert Baer Jr. Amos Doggie & Hannah -- "Just a Hunch" DISCLAIMER Road Rovers characters, names, situations and the Road Rovers universe are the property of Warner Bros. I, nor this script/story are connected with Warner Bros. in any way, shape or form. This document may not be publicized or reproduced in any way, shape or form. It must remain fully intact and may not be altered in anyway. It is strictly used for not-for-profit entertainment purposes only, and is not intended to infringe on any Copyrights. This story is written by Robert Baer Jr and the characters Amos Doggie, Hannah, Otto, Samantha Maddog and Molly Maddog are all Robert Baer Jr's creations, copyright 1997-1999. DJ is a creation of Jake Williams. Amos Doggie & Hannah -- "Just a Hunch" The scene is the fabulous Waldorf Hotel in downtown San Francisco. In the huge ballroom area, a large buffet luncheon is being served. All of this is for the an important peace treaty signing. A delegation of Road Rovers were asked to attend. Among them are Hunter, Colleen, Blitz, Shag, Exile, Molly, DJ, Otto, Samantha, Amos Doggie and his lovely wife Hannah. All of them are dressed in formal attire, even Amos was wearing a tuxedo. Amos and Hannah walk through the reception line and begin filling their plates with food. AMOS (picks up a jumbo shrimp): Lookie lookie! These be funny lookin' crawdads, I guarantee! HANNAH (smiles): Honey, they're called shrimp, and they are delicious! AMOS (looks all around): Day call dis a buffet? Where be the crawdad bisque? HANNAH (elbows Amos): Be nice, darling! Remember, we have to make a good impression, we represent the Road Rovers! AMOS (nods): Amos understand, but I not be liking this monkey suit I be wearin'! Why can I not be wearing me overalls and flannel shirt? HANNAH (laughs): You look wonderful, sweetie! I'm very proud of you! Let's take our plates and find a place to sit down. Amos and Hannah sit at a table with the other Rovers. HANNAH (whispers to Amos): Remember what I taught you about using utensils AMOS (nods, whispers back): I will, Hannah! With that, Amos pokes a dinner roll with a fork and proceeds to cut it with his knife. He then uses his spoon to pick up single shrimp from his plate and pop them into his mouth. HUNTER (slight smile): Well, that's a ....er.... unique way to eat! COLLEEN (rolls eyes): er.....right.... BLITZ (laughs): You make me laugh, old dog! HANNAH (growls): Leave him alone, Blitz, or I'll flatten you right here in front of all of these people! BLITZ (cringes): Ok, ok, please don't hurt me, I'm allegric to pain! COLLEEN (under her breath): I really like this lady..... HANNAH (turns to Colleen): Why, thank you, Colleen! COLLEEN (confused): Huh? HUNTER (smiles): It's her super hearing at work again! COLLEEN (embarrassed): Oh, I see.... OTTO (turns to the others): The peace treaty is scheduled to be signed in a few hours. SAMANTHA (smiles): That will give us all time to mingle with the crowd! AMOS (shakes head): Amos not mingle well... HANNAH (smiles): Darling, you and I are Road Rovers now. We have to be socialable before the treaty is signed. Just follow my lead, you'll do fine! AMOS (nods): I sure be hoping so, woman! It's one hour after the buffet ended. All of the Road Rovers are mingling with the large crowd, most of the people have surrounded Hunter and Colleen. Blitz continues to boast about his bravery in front of a group of young ladies, Exile sneaks up behind him and barks loudly, causing Blitz to run across the other side of the room as Exile and the others laugh. Shag stays at the buffet table and commences to eat all of the leftover food. Otto finds a group of scientists to talk with, Samantha gets bored and walks over to where Hannah and Amos are standing. Hannah is shaking hands and having 'small talk' with many in the crowd. Former President Jimmy Carter walks over to them. JIMMY CARTER (big smile): How y'all doin'? You Road Rovers are really a great bunch of dogs! HANNAH (shakes hands): Why thank you, Mr President! AMOS (confused): Mr President? Ain't that Clinton guy President? HANNAH (whispers): Dear, he's a former President of the United States... AMOS (whispers back): Then why is it ya call HIM President den? HANNAH (whispers): Out of respect, honey! AMOS (nods) Oh, I see..... (shakes hands): Hey der President, How's it waggin? JIMMY CARTER (confused): Er..... well..... (points) I see my wife across the room, please excuse me .... As Jimmy Carter walks away, Hannah gently elbows her husband. HANNAH (hushed tone): Amos, why on earth did you tell President Carter that? AMOS (smiles): Hey, dats how Hunter always greets me! HANNAH (rolls eyes): Oh boy.... SAMANTHA (smiles): Please don't be too hard on Uncle Amos, he's not used to being in social settings like this.. HANNAH (nods): You're right, Sam. (turns to Amos): Amos, I have to go to the little girls room now, I'll be right back! SAMANTHA (smiles): I have to go also, Aunt Hannah (turns to Amos): We'll be back soon! AMOS (confused): Hey! What do I do here all alone? HANNAH (smiles): Just mix and mingle, you can do it! As he watches his wife and Samantha walk away, Amos begins searching the room for his Road Rover friends. Not paying attention to where he's walking, Amos accidently bumps into William Shanter, causing them both to fall to the floor. AMOS (sits up): Amos so sorry to be running into you ... (looks down on the floor): LOOK!!! A GIANT HAIRBALL!! I'll go throw it away! WILLIAM SHANTER (jumps up): HEY!!! MY TOUPEE!!! (grabs it): Give me that, you stupid mutt! AMOS (growls, pulls on it): Hey, we must keep this nice hotel clean! Shanter pulls hard on his toupee, finally wrestling it away from Amos, unaware that he has been surrounded by photographers who begin taking pictures of the 'real' William Shanter. WILLIAM SHANTER (angry): HEY!! STOP TAKING PICTURES OF ME!!! William Shanter runs away with the group of photographers in hot pursuit. As Amos turns to leave, he accidently bumps into another person, former Olympic skater Nancy Kerrigan. This causes her to fall down, spilling her plate of food and her drink all over her. She's so astonished, she can only look up at Amos and wailfully moan "WHY? WHY?" AMOS (reaches hand to her): Amos be very sorry miss, I help you up now... NANCY (furious): Don't you touch me, you mangy looking mutt! I'd rather be sitting at DisneyWorld wearing those ridiculous looking ears again than to let a filthy animal like you touch me! AMOS (defensive): Filthy? I have you know I took me weekly bath early just for dis occassion! NANCY (stands to her feet): Just SHUT UP, DOG FACE! Nancy stomps her feet as she walks away, Amos is so upset, he turns towards the door where he bumps into a bearded man wearing a tuxedo. The man simply looks all around and disappears into the crowd without a word. Hannah and Samantha walk back over to Amos, who is very, very angry. AMOS (furious): Amos go home now! Dis social stuff I like not! HANNAH (puts hand on his shoulder): Darling, what's the matter? AMOS (angry): I just stand here and I be attacked by a man's hairy pet and yelled at by an angry female! Dis not be fun for me, I go back to the swamp! SAMANTHA (puts hand on his other shoulder): Uncle Amos, sir, please don't leave, the peace treaty is about to be signed. Please stay a little longer, OK? HANNAH (Looks Amos in the eyes): PLEASE????? AMOS (slight smile): Ah! I can't be saying no to dose blue eyes of yours! Ok, I stay, but you ladies stand wit me, Amos not want any more trouble! HANNAH (nods): Alright, I'll stay with you! SAMANTHA (nods): So will I, Uncle Amos, sir! Minutes later, the delegates line up behind a long table for the official peace treaty signing. All of those in attendence move forward in order to see this historical event. Amos, Samantha and Hannah are standing in the front 'row' of people, the delegates walk around the table and shake hands with those folks in front. Amos and the other Rovers shake many delegates hands, but when the bearded man walks over to shake Amos's hand, he takes his bionic hand and punches him, smiling as he watches him fall to the floor in a heap. HANNAH (shocked): AMOS!!!!! SAMANTHA (shocked): UNCLE AMOS!!!!!! Otto quickly runs over and grabs Amos's arms and holds them behind him back. COLLEEN (angry): What in the bloomin' world is the matter with you! HUNTER (angry): Hey buddy, you don't just go around punching people for no reason. DJ (looks at bearded man): Maybe he HAD a reason guys! Take a look at this! DJ reaches over to the unconscience man's beard and gently tugs on it. The fake beard pulls right off. MOLLY (feels face): That beard was glued on his face! This guy's an imposter! Hotel security and police quickly arrive on the scene. FBI Agent Betty Dulland takes a good look at the unmasked imposter. BETTY (points): That's Renaldo Van Quaido! He's an hired assassin wanted in twelve countries, including THIS one! (turns to Hunter): Good work, Road Rovers! We had a tip that someone would try to murder the delegates, you really saved the day! HUNTER (shakes head): It wasn't me, ma'am (points): Amos Doggie is the one who nabbed him! BETTY (shakes his hand): Amos Doggie! How did you know? AMOS (smiles): I bump into him earlier, he smell like gunpowder! Amos know what dat means! MOLLY (searching Renaldo's pockets): Look! Here's a pistol with a silencer on it! He even had a few hand grenades on him! DJ (nods): Good work, Amos! Soon, the peace treaty delegates surround Amos, shaking his hand and patting him on the back. Even the hotel manager, Emily Phipps, walks over to congradulate him. EMILY (smiles): You're a national hero, Amos Doggie! Is there anything we can do for you? AMOS (huge grin): Well, dere be one ting you can do..... One hour has passed. The peace treaty has been signed, and everyone is sampling the newest item on the buffet table, a 'soup' which Amos Doggie is ladling out in small bowls. EMILY (smiles, turns to Hannah): I must admit, this special gourmet soup your husband has prepared is very tasty! What does he call it? HANNAH (smiles): It's called 'crawdad bisque', it's his own creation! EMILY (looks all around): Look at all of my guests! Look at all the peace treaty delegates! They really love this soup! You simply MUST give me the recipe! HANNAH (smiles): Thank you, Emily! BLITZ (slurps soup out of the bowl): Ya! Tat Amos dog is very strange, but he make good soup! What's in it? Samantha whispers the recipe in Blitz's ear. BLITZ (shocked): It has THOSE in it? (face turns green) Excuse me please! Blitz runs for the restroom while the other Rovers laugh out loud! DJ (smiles): Good one, Sam! COLLEEN (giggles): What did ya tell'm? EXILE (laughs): Da, tell us, what did you say to weird boy? SAMANTA (smiles): All I did was tell Blitz what was crawdads were! HUNTER (nods): So THAT'S what did it! By the way, what are crawdads? Samantha quickly tells the other Rovers what crawdads are. COLLEEN (frowns): Ewwwwwwwwwww! GROSS!!!! HUNTER (shocked): You mean I ate THOSE? EXILE (smiles): I've eaten worse tings in Siberia! SHAG (nods): Ruh ruh ruh ruh? SAMANTHA (shakes head); No, Mr Shag, sir, Amos doesn't use toilet water! SHAG (frowns): Rah rucks! DJ (turns to Molly): So that's what's really in your uncle's bisque? MOLLY (nods): Yes, I've eaten it since I was a puppy, do you like it? DJ (smiles): Hey, it's tasty, I'll eat it! HANNAH (smiles): Thank you, DJ! I think it would be wise not to tell our human guests what's really in crawdad bisque, they could have a reaction like Blitz did! OTTO (nods): Sounds like good advice, however, this unique food has very high nutritional value, such as ... SAMANTHA (interrupts): Darling, please, let's not get too technical here, OK? MOLLY (looks outside): DJ, there's a full moon out tonight. How about a walk together in the courtyard? DJ (nods): Sounds good to me! Lead on! As DJ and Molly walk outside, Otto and Samantha decide to join them in the courtyard and follow them out. COLLEEN (looks outside): Huntie-Wuntie, look outside! See all those couples out there walking together? Does that give you any ideas? HUNTER (nods): It sure DOES! COLLEEN (brightens): Really? HUNTER (happy): Yeah! With all those folks outside, we can both go have another bowl of crawdad bisque! COLLEEN (under her breath): That's not exactly the idea I had in mind.... HANNAH (elbows Amos): Darling, you say it this time! AMOS (nods): Alright! TO THE POWER OF THE PACK!!! All of the Road Rovers howl in unison. -----------------------------------------------------------